Quack! from Lois

Time For A Dip

Marina car park, quarter past ten,
Greeted by supporters, hugging and then
Pile onto the boat, name SUVA onside,
Quickly to Shakespeare, pray God, or the tide?

Flick of the goggles; I’m jumping right in,
“Follow the torch!” Cries next of kin,
Ignore him totally, nothing new there
And I’m onto the beach with a moment to spare.

“I’ll see you later,” just a width of the sea,
If I swim quickly I’ll be home for tea,
Adjust the position next to the boat,
Hope the weather will allow me to float.

One hour, 2 hours and a couple of feeds,
2 scoops of maxim all my body needs,
Look to the sky, not a star in sight,
My oh my this will be a long night.

Hit the wall within four hours or five,
Dark means moral goes into a dive,
Cheers from support crew, change side of the boat,
Winds getting up on France’s great moat.

Night time dwindles, punched out the sun,
But army of clouds cover a thousand to one,
Message on whiteboard, aunt up all night,
Tracker has broken and given friends a fright.

Time for breakfast but no egg on toast,
Maxim served by a waiter in coat,
“Shut up!” to the fool who told me to kick;
Though France is in sight I am feeling quite sick.

Arms aching, legs aching, back aching too,
Filming inconvenient when I’m needing the loo,
Ten hour terror, tide turns its back,
Taking us backward, no chance of a slack.



“I’m going in circles,” I shout in his ear,
“I only go forward,” yells pilot of the year,
Beach is in sight, at least on the ship,
Three hours ‘til I see it when Neil takes a dip.

Race with the skipper to the beach and climb out,
Rocks on Cap Nez Blanc but nothings in doubt,
Finished the swim now back to the boat,
Legs seizing up and a very sore throat.

Journey back was meant to be fun,
Eight times through sickness before I am done,
Friends on Marina but too tired to wave,
Finally step onto the dry land I crave.

Now looking back it’s a bit of a blur,
Not really prepared for what’s going to occur,
Lots of questions, a sip of champagne,
One thing I know wouldn’t do that again.

Abby Taylor – Baptie
1st October 2010